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Zoicite☆For all I carry are murdered


"Cause I'll be lighting fires for you.."

~I'm there in the Light when you need me~

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Writer's Block: Forget me not
Zoicite☆For all I carry are murdered
What is your earliest vivid memory? Why do you think this memory stands out so much in your mind?

I have really forgotten most of my memories but my earliest memory was sort of jumpstarted by trauma in my mind. When I was three years old, I was in a very serious car wreck involving my grandmother and my great grandmother. The car wreck killed my great grandmother but managed to leave my grandmother alive but with complications, and I was in the back in a car seat, and I had gotten launched out of the back window which in essence saved my life. I do not remember anything UP TO THE POINT OF THE WRECK. There are no memories that exist, but I remember being in the police car and this nice policeman was letting me listen to the radio, and then they took me into the ambulance to see my grandmother and I remember her face was all bloody, and when they tried to take me out of the ambulance, I screamed and cried. It's particularly painful for the first thing that I really recall from my life, and I don't think there is any way for me to actually -forget- that moment.

When something vivid, I guess it doesn't really have to be all sunshine and rainbows which my childhood definitely wasn't. I had good moments during my childhood, but there was this overriding fear of loss. And because my first overriding memory was of death, I couldn't really breathe easy until my grandmother died. That's a sad thing to say I know, but I kept expecting her to die because at a young age, with my first memory, I was faced with the very concept of mortality.

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That's such a traumatic memory, it's quite scary that happened at such a young age but I guess it also made you appreciate life. My sister nearly died when I was 10 from a disease and it's always made me appreciate what we have at the moment.

You know, I think that it definitely makes me appreciate life more.. because you never know when you'll be taken away from life, it's a sad way to think of things but it's a realistic way as well.

This really moved me, but I don't know what to say. It must have been terrifying.

This is strange to say, but the first reply makes a lot of sense to me.

I try to live with absolutely no regrets and I try to leave nothing unsaid. It also made me value my grandmother's life much more until the point at where she died, because I knew that with everything, I'd eventually lose her.

It was terrifying.. I had too much death really in my childhood being that my mother also died two weeks after I was born, it's something that I'm really no stranger to. But my mother's death, didn't impact me like my greatgrandmother's death did I think, for while I don't really remember her, I still had that moment where I just saw everyone who surrounded me who mourned her, and I was enough of a sponge at that moment where I sort of took all of that in to myself.

I wonder if there's just something about those kinds of memories stick, one of my earliest memories is fairly traumatic too, but not quite the way that yours is. *hugs*

Really after that I remember alot of things, but I just don't remember anything before that. It's just strange how that happened to me... just like I know the first nightmare I had that I remembered, I still remember it because it was the first nightmare in which I think my fear clicked with me and I woke up realizing exactly what it meant. *huga*

That's such a traumatic memory to have...and to have experienced it at such a young age. *hugs*

*hugs* That is quite a traumatic memory. I think scarier memories in life tend to stick. My earliest memory is when I was 2(almost 3), and a drawer dropped on my foot when in the kitchen.

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